Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Clearly, I haven't been blogging. I think this picture is a fairly good representation for the way I've been feeling recently. That said. I vow to get my act (read:shit) together within the next 24 hours. If you think that my efforts with Kiss and Type have been weak you should see my laundry/room/life.
My head hasn't been in the right place to blog recently. I. Am. Having. A. Quarter. Life. Crisis. I feel as though I am currently crippled by a fear of making the "wrong" decisions and, well, its about that time when those decisions have to be made. I have a friend who's motto is, "you are where you are supposed to be", and I want so bad to believe that, but the past week I've entertained jobs/moves to NYC, Miami, Cambodia, and Maryland, leaving me feeling as though I may just be the exception to that rule. The simple truth is that I've made mistakes, big HUGE life changing geographic mistakes. And I don't want to do that again. To those people who say "you have to make mistakes to end up where you are today" to that I call bull shit. Speaking as someone who has made the mistakes, there was a simpler, cheaper, more time effective approach to life than the one I took. This is fact. And I would do it ALL differently given the opportunity. So now, when faced with making another big decision, I am frozen. One day you wake up and realize that this isn't a game, this is your life, and the stakes all the sudden get that much higher.
Anyway. That is why I've been blogging at a snails pace. I figured I could make excuses or just be honest. Please stay with me as I muddle through my quarter life. As for my plan? I'm just going to keep doing what I do best... Keep Calm and Carry On.
Posted by Arax-Rae Van Buren at 4:13 PM